Mis-Named Syndromes

One of the interesting things about my job at Franklin Roosevelt's big experiment in ignoring the Enumerated Powers Clause of the Constitution is that I get to deal with people from all walks of life.  In a matter of minutes, I can be on the phone with a university bigwig with a huge salary, and then I can be helping someone who has had lifelong significant mental problems severe enough that they are considered disabled by SSA's rather strict guidelines.

The cases on the extreme are easy, but then there are the ones in the middle.  They dwell in that grayish area between mental disorder and old-fashioned bad behavior.  Of course, it is in the best interests of the medical and "social work" communities (though sadly, not society in general) to push the leaners towards mental disorder instead of bad behavior, so more and more people living in increasingly lighter shades of gray get pushed towards a finding of some sort of mental disorder.

As a case in point, a few weeks ago, I learned of a new disorder called "Oppositional Defiant Disorder."  The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry fact sheet on ODD lists the symptoms as follows:

• Frequent temper tantrums
• Excessive arguing with adults
• Often questioning rules
• Active defiance and refusal to comply with adult requests and rules
• Deliberate attempts to annoy or upset people
• Blaming others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior
• Often being touchy or easily annoyed by others
• Frequent anger and resentment
• Mean and hateful talking when upset
• Spiteful attitude and revenge seeking

In other words, they're kids.  Shocking.

What I found really telling was the recommended treatment.  In a list of some eight or ten treatments, the very first one listed was "Parent Management Training Programs to help parents and others manage the child’s behavior."

In other words, the most effective way to deal with your defiant, rude, and disrespectful child is to learn to be a decent parent.

 Calling this "Oppositional Defiant Disorder" is like saying a puppy has "Indoor Incontinence Disorder."  If the dog isn't housebroken, it ain't the dog's fault.  Therefore, I submit to you, gentle reader, that this syndrome has been horrifically misnamed.  Hereafter, it shall be referred to as follows:

"This Child Needs an Ass Whuppin' Disorder."

Admittedly, TCNaAWD doesn't roll off the tongue as easily as ODD, but it's far more accurate and identifies both the problem and its solution.

And that's life, from my oppositionally defiant position.